Female geography

It's rather late for a change.

But Jane’s too old to have a baby.

It's either this or condoms.

They say the cervix feels like the end of your nose

which is rubbish.

There is a map of the world in there

but it's difficult to navigate

without a compass.

The doctor at the clinic

smoothly clad in flowered pants

had a cracking good sense of humour

which no doubt comes in handy

if you spend all day

pushing flying saucers up chimneys

amidst flab and foolish questions.

"It can't get lost," she said

drawing a diagram

and intoning lists of sweet statistics

while Jane saw herself padding heavily round

the corridors at work

in tent-like maternity dresses.

And even now she wonders about

the free spirits the instructions talk about

the tadpoles looking for prey

that swim without rancour or pity

around that loosely fitting rubber rim.